100% Kelly

When I came home from work the other night, I saw the yaya reading this to Manu:

Nyahahaha!

Gats bought this little book the other day, and apparently, he just left it lying around the room. The yaya probably thought it would help better her english (as my instructions to my helpers is to speak to Manu in the language), so she probably thought it would be a good read to my little boy.

Nyahahaha!

It is a good read indeed (but not to a toddler you see) as this little book gave me a good laugh (but it’s still staying in the shelves). It was hilarious in fact! How hilarious? Read on. (Below are just a few of the many “words of wisdom” taken directly from the book. The phrases in italics are the author’s own “hirits” )

Don’t judge me. I’m not a book!
oo nga naman.

I told you not to go to, and you still go to, now look at!
sabi naman kasi sayo eh.

It’s a blessing in the sky!
tama nga naman. sa langit nanggagaling mga blessings.

I ran into some errands (magkakilala rin pala kayo nina errands!)

Every cloud has a silver lightning.
baket may gold ba.

…grab the bull by the balls
aray kupo!

You can have your cake and bake it too!
ganun naman pala eh. pwede pala yan.

Don’t just do something! Stand there.
sabi nang tayo eh.

Let’s burn the bridge when we get there.
ay ginawa kang arsonista.

Give him the benefit of the daw. (Ano daw?!)

Why won’t you cut me some slacks?
eh baka naman wala syang slacks.

It’s not my problem anymore. It’s your problem anymore!
yes it’s your problem anymore.

And where do you think you are off to running to?
palipas lang sakit ng ulo.